Remembering Those Who Mourn

Remembering Those Who Mourn

A Year into GriefOLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

Just a little over a year ago, she was a contented wife and mother of three.  Today, she is a loss-survivor.  She is a single parent.  She is healing.  She is still hurting.  She is a widow ~ a word that has no up side to it. And where are the people in her life that still remember she suffers from the accidental death of her husband?  Who is mindful that the fear of raising 3 daughters without their father haunts her each night?  Who is still willing to let her cry it out in order to make space for the adjustment of life without him? Who knows that financial issues keep annoying her like a thorn in her foot?  Who understands that grief is a long and scary path into darkness?  Is she walking it alone?   It’s been a year now.  But it’s not over!  I am writing these thoughts because supporting the bereaved is a long term commitment.  It means purposely being present.  Welcoming the tears.  Buffering the anger. Gently lending help.  Always listening.  Sometimes sharing.   Keeping on praying.  Supporting & caring.  Remember the loss-survivors in your life.  Touch base with them ~ a letter, note, phone call, e-mail, text that lets them know you still remember their pain.  Invite them out to lunch, over for a home cooked meal, or a special outing.  Take them on a trip, go golfing, fishing, walking.  Share your memories of their loved one.  Be forthright and let them know you are sorry you haven’t stayed in touch better.  Let them know that their healing process is of importance to you and you support them.  But most of all remind them of the trust they can have in God’s faithfulness to exchange their despair for joy, their mourning for garments of praise and their ashes for beauty (Is. 61:3).  God specializes in healing broken hearts and He needs us to be the physical presence of His love to those who mourn.

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